‘Read! In the name of thy Lord and Cherisher, Who Created-‘
(Surah Al Alaq, verse 1, the first Revelation)
Assalamualaikum wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuh, my dear brothers and sisters.
I was preparing for a training program when Daniel said, ‘ Mummy, you always talk about us in your training and use our stories as examples. How come we don’t get anything for it…?’
LOL, you can be sure I felt I got sucker-punched right there and then! Wow. He is so observant and thinks beyond what he sees in front of him. This is a young boy who observes, ponders and expresses those thoughts succinctly and thoroughly.
As for me, considering it never crossed my mind that one of my sons would ask for IP (Intellectual Property) rights from me, to say I stood there looking stunned is an understatement. I was flabbergasted. Speechless. But, being a khalifah mother, I took a deep breath and said, ‘You’re right, Daniel. You both deserve something for being great qudwa (good examples) to others.’
I haven’t said anything specific to them about what they will get yet, because I wanted to create a gap between the time he asked for it and the time they will receive it. It helps to shift the focus on the physical act of getting a reward (after asking for it) to being rewarded with a gift sometime later.
Immediate rewards work best when it is intangible i.e. a smile, a praise, a hug or pat on the back. It shows the sincerity of the the giver. But with material rewards, sometimes it is better to delay the giving to correct the message being written that ‘when I do something good, I’ll get a present for it.’ It usually creates expectations of getting more presents in the future.
Learning from the wisdom of my children is very fulfilling. Life is beautiful, Masha’Allah.